


The Jedi Knight

by Hippediva



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Humour, Parody, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-03-20
Updated: 2001-03-20
Packaged: 2017-10-08 05:26:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/73153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hippediva/pseuds/Hippediva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Parody of Alfred Noyes' "The Highwayman"</p><p>seriously delusion parody poem...warning, Will Robinson, silly stuff ahead!</p>
    </blockquote>





	The Jedi Knight

**Author's Note:**

> Parody of Alfred Noyes' "The Highwayman"
> 
> seriously delusion parody poem...warning, Will Robinson, silly stuff ahead!

The ship was a streak of darkness among the glist'ning stars  
The moons were twin orbs glowing, one near, one very far  
The approach was a twisted ribbon over the darkned towers  
When the Jedi-Knight came flying , flying, flying,  
The Jedi-Knight came flying, up to the Temple doors.

He'd a old brown cloak o'er his shoulders, pulled up to his bearded chin  
He'd a pair of roughened tunics, and boots of bantha-skin  
They fitted without a wrinkle, nearly 5 feet up to his thigh  
and he flew like a spangled twinkle, his lightsabre a twinkle  
His dark blue eyes a-twinkle,  
Under the Coruscant skies.

Over the jeweled towers of the Temple at Coruscant  
To the Inner Sanctum walls, where none by the Order dare  
He docked and tapped with a Force-touch but the place was locked and dark  
He whistled three notes at a window and who was waiting there?  
But the Jedi's sole prize love slave, Obi-Wan, the Jedi's love-slave  
Patiently braiding the love-braid,  
Into his short red hair.

One fuck, my greedy sweetheart, I'm after a prize tonight  
But I'll be back with the Chosen One before the morning light  
Yet if they made it harder, and harry me thru the day  
I'll promise to wait for you love, so watch for me when you come love  
I'll come with you in the night love,  
Tho' the Dark Side bar the way.

His cock rose up in his leggings, he scare could catch his breath  
But the boy leaned out of the window and licked his way down his chest  
With a Force-inducement to stay still, he welcomed the loving kiss  
Then pushed his way in with a whisper, his cock and balls a-blister  
and Obi came with a scream, while his Jedi came with a hiss.

He flew away to the west and wasn't there at dawn  
He wasn't there at sunset and Obi suppressed a yawn  
"I suppose I'll have to spread out for that slimy Palpatine!"  
He shrugged and bathed in the moonlight  
Washed and oiled in the moonlight  
Smirked and squeaked in the moonlight  
and moved like a starved sex fiend.

 

 

He didn't know that a clone-troop hastened to this place  
He couldn't speak as Darth Maul shoved his dick into his face  
The stormtroopers waited around him as his mouth went raw &amp; numb  
That before the night was over, before the moon shone over  
Before he'd coaxed them over  
They'd all have had his bum.

He writhed and moaned in the moonlight, he sucked each cock in turn  
He posed and pouted and whimpered until his skin was hot and burned  
He took them all and they tumbled and he shrugged with a bored jest,  
"That's what comes of fucking a Jedi,  
A hard-hung, white-hot Jedi,  
A hugely Masterful Jedi,  
Keep up, they can't, the rest.

Oh ghods, Obi gasped with horror, I can't believe my ears  
I'm talking like Master Yoda!!! But no one heard his tears  
UGGGHGGG Master he screamed in the moonlight  
As his lean limbs shrivled and dried  
And he turned quite green in the moonlight  
shrank and shivered in the moonlight  
Changed in the watchfull moonlight  
And croaked along with the rest

Qui-Gon got a sickened feeling, deep within his gut  
Oh shit my Master is in it, up to his puke green butt  
He's fucked around with my Obi, and made him a slimy thing  
And now I'll have to kiss him, kiss him  
Kiss that greasy creater,  
And ask him for a fuck

He turned with a Gaelic curse, his lightsabre weilded high  
I'll get back at that fuckin' lepracaun and I'll shove this belly-high!!  
But all he did when he landed, was root around in the swamp  
Till he found his beloved Obi, his poor changed lover Obi  
His green and yellow Obi, ribetting in the dark

Oh shit, the Jedi sighed looking down at the frog in his hand  
I suppose I have to do this, but this is getting out of hand  
Do you think, sweet Obi, you could find it inside you to be nice  
And stop mass-screwing the Jedi, stop mass-screwing the Jedi  
Or the Council, just pick one vice!!!

 

Croak croak whined the tiny frog nestled in his palm  
As the Jedi leaned in closer he felt a kind of calm  
"I love you my moron Padawan, but you know who taught you this  
You're addicted to ancient creche tales,  
Sex-crazed ancient creche tales  
And I'll take it out of your own tail  
Tomorrow at daylight."


End file.
